From the desk of Sabine the Party 👑
Do you prefer to use your twitter identity until that first meeting or conversation with another couple? I almost forget my Sabine nickname sometimes, but there is always that guy or gal that only knows me by that name. Then I remember the little stories that I have created for those just in case moments, should we ever get found by family, coworkers, etc! We were so concerned about our identities in the beginning, afraid of being caught or noticed. What a shame really. Grown adults, scared to be themselves, for thinking differently..than mom, dad, grandma, cousins....i’m from a big family, big nosy, gossipy, rotten at times family.
I was mostly afraid of looking our oldest daughter in the eyes and telling the truth! Yikes!! I raised her in parochial school, for education mostly, but there is religion. I am not trying to offend anyone, but you know what church says about people like me, us right? What is told, preached daily, to those kids so that they can be good upright citizens and pay taxes and all that shit. I was scared for a while. Thankfully, I have not yet had that talk with her.
I had that talk with her younger sister, when our middle daughter found a camera. Fuck!!. Now it did not contain the most offensive materials, however it did have some stuff. Use your imagination, and also the fact that she was 16 years old. So, she asked us this very question. Are you guys swingers or something? I wish you could have been there to hear her voice. She is hilarious and a little edgy most of the time, so we froze and just looked at her. What do you know about swingers? We asked. She just looked at us and left the pool deck. Hmmmmm, I told Lu she was his problem, not mine! LOL. So after a few days, when we were all set for a vacation together, we decided that she was the kid who could handle it and we were going to be honest with her. And we were, on a long car ride to Chitzen Itza we answered her questions. We were of course careful, she didn't need to know everything. We wanted her to know that it was a community of kind, caring nice people that made decisions to have sex with other partners occasionally. And she was fine, really fine! Our hope was to empower her in knowing that she owns her body and is free to make decisions and be open with us and any partners she may have.
That wasn’t so bad. I am now in plan mode to confront my mother!! This one is hurting a lot more. Our niece found our Instagram account. It’s not too bad, but she kept digging and digging. So my cousin, her mother, sent me a very damming text yesterday about what kind of parents we are and oh she didn't see that coming! So since we are clearly not good at hiding our alter egos , I let her have it, being concise and direct focusing on the fact that we impose ourselves on no one! Not sure we will ever speak again, not because of my life choices, but her judgement. Take me, leave me, I am over it. Honestly, in the beginning I thought we would play a bit and move on to something else. Since that didn't happen, and I no longer work for a conservative mostly catholic financial institution, we are free and some family members are going to need therapy.
We are in the best place of our adult lives, and we know amazing people because of a choice that we made together. We never had these gifts before we decided on the lifestyle. After we formed LifeinSTyLe, our lives got magical and we couldn’t be more thankful.
**Originally published in 2020**